fridays

the memories don't seem to compensate.

stolen cookies from the jar, saving swing sets in the park.

jumping on the trampoline, playing games in the unfinished yard that we shared.

remember when you said we would be the best-est of friends?

you said now that you are my friend, i will always be there for you.

remember adam always said it'd end.  we'd all grow up & go our separate ways.

i guess it happened sooner than i expected.

it happened sooner than adam expected even.

for this feeling as i move into the next phase of my life.

you probably don't remember this.  but there was one time you got sick & i thought you'd died you were gone so long.

i used it to inspire my very first song.

& we decided to start a band.  but making t-shirts was as far as we got.

we all grew up.  & all got jobs.

chasing girls & chasing dollars.

maybe it was perfect & i just won't accept it

maybe i'm just upset that i'm the kid who wouldn't throw a party at his house while his parents were out of a town.

not because he'd feel guilty.

but because no one would answer his phone calls.

maybe i just want memories that feel like a beach house song

maybe i just want people to agree with me that beach house is a great band

i just hate how this feels like failure.  not closure.

i miss our pie-day fridays.

& our aspirations to make an album.

& i never thought i'd say it but i miss lone peak.

maybe just my friends.

but i shouldn't be missing them yet.

because lone peak is over.  & i haven't moved to logan yet.

& of course i fell in love.

what a treacherous thing to fall in love.

& what a treacherous thing. this, one, meaningless life of mine.